The sparks of electricity within us when we collide
The Greatest
The undeniable force that connects us
The Greatest
The passion spreading like a wildfire
The Greatest
The need to claim your body and mind
The Greatest
There has been others but none compare to you
Because you are The Greatest
Sometimes I wonder if what I felt for you was real
And then I see you
Sometimes I doubt that it felt as real to you
And then I heard you
Sometimes I wonder what could have been
But then I remember
Just because I love you does not mean you love me back
Just because I want a ”yes” does not mean you will not say no”
Just because I feel it does not mean you feel it too
Just because I believe in us does not mean we cannot crack
Just because I want you to stay does not mean you will not go
And just because I dream it does not mean it will come true
Sometimes I wish I could not feel
So I could see you
Sometimes I wish I would not care
So I would hear you
Sometimes I wish there was a future
Without the remembrance of us
To fall for another human being is the freest fall. The most uncontrolled, the most illogical, and at the same time logical, thing to do when another human hits you so recklessly. There are no safety lines. There are no airbags when feelings of love blows up our inner control tower. Then we stand completely defenseless. At our most vulnerable. How terrifying and divine is it that someone can make us lose our footing so fast that we barely feel the tremor before the ground shatters underneath us?
I wasn’t even supposed to fall. I didn’t want to. I told myself I wouldn’t. It happened too fast. I wasn’t ready. You are not my saviour, not my quick fix. You are not my one and only. You’re not mine and you don’t want me to be yours. You’re not ready either. Still, I fell. Still, I feel. And I don’t want to. Not yet.
Falling so that all you can remember when your head hits the pillow is the other person’s scent. To be given only a finger and making in into a whole arm. To let the obsession take over and to gratefully devour everything you’re given. To miss what has not yet been and to glorify yesterday. To want to rest in the other person’s perfections. To be hypnotized by their words so that the only thing you hear is all the good, everything you’ve longed to hear.
To fumble around in feelings that projects dreams of an us. To patch up the pieces that remains when no one cushioned the fall. And isn’t it crazy how astonishingly we can fall over and over again? It’s what drives us, and destroys us. It’s the torture, and the reward. It’s the fall, that hurts so gravely, that makes us feel so alive. How life is for real.
(Att falla – translated into English)
(From 2010)
I broke down the wall
And scarified my soul
For you I stole the tears of heaven
And gained nothing but empty words
The blindness of my eyes
Has kept me from the light of life
And my speechless mind
Has left for you the secret of my heart
(From Secondary School years)
My illusions will always be my illusions
Just so I can create a bigger vision
My love will always be my love
Just so I can feel a greater passion
My pride will always be my pride
Just to make me stand taller
My dreams will always be my dreams
And you can never take them away
My illusions were just illusions
They teared down my biggest vision
My love was just a crush
That left me here all alone
My dreams were just dreams
And you woke me up
My pride was just a mask
That still made me feel weak inside
You’re so near and yet so significantly far
You can’t touch me but still leave a scar
You make it impossible for me to move on
Instead I count the days since you’ve been gone
I still reach for the phone to see how you are
Could you please stop showing up on my radar
Unfriend me, log out and leave me be
You’re hurting me but you’re too blind to see
Your mixed messages keep leading me stray
As long as you’re not mine I will never be ok
The memories of you makes me weak to my knee
If you really don’t love me you have to set me free
With your silence and everything you don’t say
You chain me in that suffocating way
You locked me up and threw the key
I can’t help it, you still reign over me
